The resume of John Kerry.

The part about it being a resume, I found on another board. The facts, however, are just true.


RESUME

Hello. My name is John Kerry and I'm running for President, I think. Please consider this resume when voting int he 2004 election.

RESUME OF JOHN F. KERRY

RESIDENCE:
Seven mansions, including Washington DC, worth multi-millions.

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:
College: I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not get admitted to Harvard or graduate with an M.B.A

MILITARY:
I used three minor injuries to get an early discharge from the military and service in Vietnam.

I then returned to the US, joined Jane Fonda in protesting the war, and insulted returning Vietnam vets, claiming they committed atrocities and were baby killers.

I threw my medals, ribbons, or something away in protest. Or did I?

My book "Vietnam Veterans against the War: The New Soldier" shows how I truly feel about the military.

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and have been there ever since.

I have no real world experience except marrying rich women and running HJ Heinz vicariously through my wife Teresa.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS US SENATOR:
I set the record for the most liberal voting record, exceeding even Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton.

I have consistently failed to support our military and CIA by voting against budgets, thus gutting our country's ability to defend itself.

Although I voted for the Iraq War, now I am against it and refuse to admit that I voted for it.

I voted in favor of every liberal piece of legislation.

I have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes significantly if I am elected.

I make no or little charitable contributions and have never agreed to pay any voluntary excess taxes in MA, despite family wealth in excess of $700 million.

I voted to cut every law enforcement, CIA and defense bill in my career as a US Senator.

I ordered Boston to remove a fire hydrant in front of my mansion, thereby endangering my neighbors in the event of fire.

Although I claim to be in favor of alternative energy sources, Ted Kennedy and I oppose windmills off Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard as it might spoil our view of the ocean as we cruise on our yachts.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES: None.

PERSONAL:
My wealth so far exceeds that of my counterpart, George Bush, that he will never catch up.

I ride a Serotta bicycle ($2000-$6500).

My Gulfstream V Jet I call "The Flying Squirrel."

I named my $850,000 42-foot Hinckley twin diesel yacht the "Scarmouche".

I don't own any SUVs but my family does, including one parked at my Nantucket summer mansion, though I am against large polluting inefficient vehicles and blame George Bush for the energy problems.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.


Thought it was funny, mostly true and decided to post it.

(this is gonna piss people off)

[Edited on 13-9-2004 by Herman]

Even if thats true, compared to bush hes a f***ing genius!



Secone of all, whoever wrote that made a mistake, bush went to yale university also.

Herman that was not a good Idea the resume thing you know very well that Kerry's resume does not compare with Bush not even by a mile.

taking in consideration that bush spend most of his young life as an alcoholic, not a good choice, this thread does not even can become a debate.

Well, here's the closest to a traditional resume I could put together for the previous President, current President, and the other two men who want to become President:

Bill Clinton
BA Foreign Service, Georgetown, 1968
Rhoades Scholar, Oxford (U.K.), 1969-1970
Law Degree, Yale, 1973
Governor of the State of Arkansas, 1978 - 1980; 1982 - 1992
President of the United States of America, 1992 - 2000

George W. Bush
BA History, Yale, 1968
MBA, Harvard, 1975
served in U.S. National Guard (Texas Air Force)
Governor of the State of Texas, 1994 - 2000
President of the United States of America, 2000 - ??

John Kerry
BA Political Science, Yale, 1966
Law Degree, Boston College, 1976
served in U.S. National Guard (Massachusetts Navy); decorated Vietman War veteran
Lieutentant Governor of Massachusetts, 1982 - 1984
U.S. Senator (Massachusetts), 1984 - ??

Ralph Nader
BA Government & Economics, Princeton, 1955
Law Degree, Harvard, 1958
served in U.S. Army
has been a lawyer in Hartford, Connecticut, and a professor at Princeton, as well as a book author

What? No one got a Bachelor of Science?

P.S. -- Did I describe Bush's and Kerry's official U.S. military records correctly? I described them as well as I could based on my understanding of their service...

It's a free board . I can post this if I want...I don't think it's against the rules. Besides, that stuff is true. I didn't write it, so criticism can go to the writer of it...

I say it can not be a debate on that, not that you could or not post it that is not my call.

[edit on 13-9-2004 by marg6043]

Oh boy I cant wait to see Bushes resume.

I thought the Fire hydrant part uh... disturbing.

I don't care, there's plenty of mud-slinging going on against Bush. Usually, when someone posts something about Bush it will just be filled with mindless insults and stuff that can't be proven. I know I'm gonna get flamed on this alot, I don't care.

Care or not, most of the stuff is ridiculous. Since when marrying a rich woman is scoffed at? I thought this is a free country. And if he indeed is managing the Heinz empire, the guy must be a genius, because you know, real busines it tough. I heard Bush didn't do too well managing a baseball team

Oh, come on. You can do better than that!

You mean better than Bush? Hmm... I donno. Probably.

Ahha, nice one! No, better than the paragraph I quoted. I just know I'm gonna get flamed, so I'm just ...bracing myself haha.

[Edited on 13-9-2004 by Herman]

Oh yeah... We're really weak at the knees.



FALSE! He has acknowledged that he voted for the war. He only said he disagrees with the way Bush is managing it.

He's just really excited....

Facts are indeed true Herman. Always are.

But are you sure these are facts?



Okay, now it's mostly true. Which parts of knowingly false information did you post?

Let me help get you started.



Actually he lost when he first ran for Congress, so your post is wrong there. It's also wrong on him having no work experience as he started working for an International Aid organization known as CARE while going to law school after his first Congressional bid (apparently your chain mail was wrong about his higher education too), and worked as both a radio talk show host and Executive Director of a Government Watchdog group called MassAction until graduating and starting his career as a prosecutor for the District Attorney's office.

Common knowledge really. Whoever wrote this fantasy is an either an idiot or expects the reader to be.

And that's just one section. Was that the part you thought was true.

References: None?

Nice. Would you like Kerry's list of endorsements?

I'm guessing then the "true" part must be stuff like "Kerry ordered Boston to remove a fire hydrant in front of his mansion" which sadly my Google search was unable to confirm anything but the fact this piece is spammed everywhere.

Even FreeperCentral (of course) where it seems to have been written, has the Freepers in a tizzy critiquing and editing it themselves where one young Republican points out the Higher Education part is wrong (but doesn't really need changing).

But we may have some confirmation of the Fire Hydrant part as a young Freeper named Joann37 assures Gopher Broke:



And Gopher Broke now assured that it surely must be true, the "Resume of John Kerry" found it's way to Herman, and eventually to us.

God Bless you Gopher Broke. God bless you.

Yes!! I got RANT. I knew you'd be here sooner or later. Because you couldn't find it on google means it's not true? And no, I didn't get it in any e-mail. I found it on another board that I post in. My post is wrong because he didn't get into congress the first time? Maybe they just wanted to give him a break and not list that it took him more than one try to get in? I said most are true, and I didn't write them. And yes, he probably expected the readers to be idiots. Most Kerry supporters are BA-ZINNNGGG!! Because google didn't have it it's not true? You seem to use all sorts of things without evidence. Again, I posted this for it to be discussed. I found it funny, and MOSTLY true. Most bad stuff, especially about democrats, doesn't get brought into the media. So yeah, continue. Keep critiquing. I've done my part, brought it into the spotlight and pissed a few people off. I always enjoy that. Oh...and bring me that list of Kerry's endorsements.

Uh huh, ya "got" me. Suckered me into that perilous position of proving what a lazy poster you are by debunking your copy/past post off the top of my head, plus minimal Googling. Well played Herman. You sure made me look stupid.



Sorry? Was this supposed to upset someone? The fact you just confessed to trolling aside, I don't think it worked. Your usual threads complaining about all the "BS posts" about Bush where you threaten to leave ATS forever seem to get more responses, so maybe try that angle some more.



Would you like the head of John the Baptist too?

Happy to teach you how to do some research Herman. If you clicky on the little red link www.johnkerry.com... and scroll down to the word "seach" you'll find a blank space where you can type in the word "endorsements" and hit return.

You'll get a summary of about 55 returns listing various press release categories some of which include multiple organizational endorsements like:

John Kerry for President - Labor Endorsements for Kerry
...Labor Endorsements for Kerry AFL-CIO Air Line Pilots Association, Alliance for Economic Justice Amalgamated Transit Union, American Federation of Government Employees, American Federation of State, County and Municipal...
www.johnkerry.com...

Or specific endorsements like these:

John Kerry for President - Kerry Endorsed by International Brotherhood of Police Officers
...Washington, DC - Democratic Presidential candidate John Kerry today received the endorsement of the International Brotherhood of Police Officers (IBPO), the only major national police organization to back the winner of the last...
www.johnkerry.com...

John Kerry for President - United Mine Workers of America Endorses John Kerry for President
...Primary Reasons for Endorsement For Immediate Release United Mine Workers of America (UMWA) International President Cecil Roberts announced today that the union has endorsed Democrat John Kerry for President. The endorsement...
www.johnkerry.com...

Fact Sheet on the Kerry-Edwards Plan, A Look at the Bush Record
...DRUG COSTS Today, John Kerry detailed his plan to lower prescription drug costs for America’s seniors and received the endorsement of the Alliance for Retired Americans. Prescription drug sales rose by 11.5 percent in 2003, and its...
www.johnkerry.com...

But if you're interested in some of the Business Leaders that endorse John Kerry for President (as this is his "resume" you're theoretically posting) there's a summary of CEO's and Corporate Leaders at:

Selected Quotes from Today’s Endorsers, Full List of Endorsements, Fact Sheet and Bios of the Summit Participants Below:
Selected Quotes from Business Leaders Endorsing...
www.johnkerry.com...

I cant post the whole list for you as it's several pages (and hundreds of references) but from A to Z it's:

Zubaid Ahmad, Managing Director of JP Morgan Securities to...
David Zucker, President & CEO of Midway Games.

I realize this isn't as "funny" a Political Debate as you hoped for in the forum today. And I certainly hope your efforts to "piss people off" aren't altogether thwarted. But since the issue was the status of "facts" and your opinion that the Googling thereof is a laughable effort, I thought you'd enjoy some evidence to the contrary.

Google is your friend Herman. For example, using it before copy/pasting the content of another website could have told you this piece not only has severe untruths, but is already posted about 257,000 times...some on ATS.

Here's a link to it posted on ATS two months before you did: www.abovetopsecret.com...

But it's in the trash now, so I guess you can't see that one. Lucky for your Johnny Come Lately version I suppose. And good luck with the trolling.


[Edited on 14-9-2004 by RANT]

RANT, don't hurt yuorself, he is a Bushie, Bush can do no wrong.

Headline News. Bush caught having sex with a goat. Bushies responses?

"He was not having sex with it for the constitution says nothing about the definition of sex meaning sex is between a man and a woman so Bush was not having sex with a goat. He may have tripped while getting out of the shower and landed on this goat. A few dozen times."

Yes, RANT, I "got" you, as in got your response. I always enjoy hearing your posts. They're interesting, and you usually take them so serious. You are a fun person to hear from, often times funny. And I certainly have drawn your attention.

Like I said so many times, this artical ISN'T MINE and it's open to debate. Debunked it off the top of your head? As I recall, you didn't "debunk" much of it. I guess your definition of debunking this one is proving to me that he actually does have endorsements, and has had a job before...that and he MAY or may not have removed a fire-hydrant from near his house...

See, the reason I think it's "funny" is because of all the negative responses I get right away. Anytime I mention I support Bush, I get at least one stupid insult. Some kid at school wanted to fight me because of it. Luckily, he's a wussy and walked away. And the part about my "usual" threads complaining about the "BS" posts? I've had... one or two as I recall that I started on my own? Besides, there are alot more people other than just me who have threatened to leave because of the BS some people post.