Silent and Gee-Gee's psychospiritual lovers' spat Hippodrome!

Well, I finally got my girlfriend to join ATS/BTS and since we will botb be posting here we decided to start a joint thread about our relationship and opposing viewpoints and so on...yes its a little self-indulgent I know, but nobody else has to join in if they don't want to...of course any and all forms of participation from others is welcome, but even if its just the two of us posting here this will be like a little virtual refrigerator where we can pin up little notes to each other. At least for a while while she settles in.

Lets see, without giving away too much personal info, the basic point of this is that A) we are in a relationship (a rather unusual one too, from my perspective) and B) we have 180-degree opposite viewpoints, philosophically and spiritually speaking. She is a hard core occultist/dark arts party girl. I am a completely sober Buddhist vegitarian.

I was an ordained Buddhist monk who spent 4 years in a Jodo-Shu monestary in Sendai, Japan, before giving that up and returning to secular life, although I rtemain a dedicated lay practitionier of Amidist Buddhism. She, meanwhile, has been initiated into a number of secret societies I consider totally eviland corrupt, like the O.T.O. and the Priestesshood of Innana.

We have been living together for about three years now and its been crazy....mad passionate love one minute, hissing and screaming at each other over some arcane metaphysical point the next (thanks for throwing that toaster at me yesterday by the way, darling. I really needed that before breakfast...not.)

I am dedicated to building compassion for all sentient beings; she wants to turn herself into a demonic astral channel for the Annunukai to return to earth. She is also much younger than me, which makes for differences as well.

So let the lovefest begin!

Oh, and my darling, sweet dark fallen angel love of my life, by the way, I'm going to call you "GG" (or "Gee Gee") because the user name you picked for yourself utterly repulses me and I absolutely refuse to use it. I will go so far as to use its initials but no further.

Your turn...

MY sweet, you had that toaster coming for at least a week.

And we are going to have to do something about this log-in-log-out stuff. Right now I am upstairs on the laptop and he is down in the den sprawled out and using the big computer. It will be time to switch in less than 20 minutes and not a minute more.

This is kind of weird but I'll swing with it for a bit at least. It was sweet of you to decide to make me my very own thread, too, since I cant make them yet.

Would you like to share with the class the story of how you are planning to leave me even though we are madly in love and can't keep our hands off each other, or shall I?

Oh so THATS why you started this. And here I am thinking you were trying to be nice.

See the face of Buddhism, folks. I.e., PASSIVE AGRESSIVIE SANCTIMONIOUS CRAP! Manipulativeness masking itself in the cloying sense of "compassion."

OK, I will put it in writing if thats what you really want. Black and white for all the world to see.

But you know...all you have to do is ask. Like I am going to ask you now, tit for tat: I will write what you want me to write but in the next post you MUST at least attempt to answer: Why is it always "shall we do X?" or "Would you like to do X?" when what you really mean is "Would you please do X for me?"

OK, and now I shall write the truth:

I adore you. I love you so much it hurts. It tears my heart apart each morning when you leave for work. I doodle your initials constantly. I have never met a man like you and I know I never will again. I LOVE YOU.

And you can have me forever...we never have to part, I will NEVER leave your side if that's what you want.

BUT...

You can have my heart forever my love, my aching tiny selfish heart that is far too small for what you deserve. Take it, break it, trample on me or treasure me, I will always love you. ALWAYS. But you cannot have my Soul. That I pledged to my Dark Master and that pledge is forever, too.

There is no reason these two things can't happen at the same time. RIGHT NOW this very minute you can decide to accept it and the truth will become the truth: I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU. Only you can decide to leave this relationship. ONLY YOU. The choice is completely yours. It is you who decided to leave me, not me. And its going to tear me to splinters and shards if it happens.

The choice is YOURS.

There is no reason at all

Yes there is always that "BUT" isn't there. Three little letter. Such a tiny, tiny thing. Such a massive, massive thing.



I have told you before I will try to be better about it. And to live up to your bargan, I shall attempt to answer "WHY:" Because harmony and agreement strikes me as more polite, and, ultimately, pleasant, than pushiness.

You call me passive aggressive but you do realize you are doing the same thing...you are trying to distort it so it looks like I am the one who will leave when really it is you.

I love you so much and I will never ever leave. See? I can write that, too. And I can mean it from the bottom of my heart, too.

And I do mean it.

So we are back where we started. The cold stone fact is that YOU are the one who set a time limit on this relationship. YOU. NOT ME. Please don't do this to us.
PLEASE.

See....also I can use the magic word please after all...and, again, I can mean it from the bottom of my heart.



[edit on 5/16/09 by silent thunder]

I never set a time limit on the relationship. NEVER.

I named a date by which I would return to my ritual practice. It has nothing to do with leaving you, it cannot, my heart is yours forever. Freely given.

When my ritual work begins again, my Dark Lord will stand at my Left Side. There is no reason you can't stand at my Right Side at the same time. That date doesn't have to mean seperation. YOU are the one who equates my ritual practice with "leaving." Oh my love, it means nothing of the sort!!!

You are such a wise man, why can't you see that?

In my ritual practice, when I become an Altar for the Ancient Ones, I become a portal for the transmission of shadowside energy and nothing more. My Dark Lord penetrates my body, yes, and he burns my third eye chakra to ashes with the magnifcence of his Dark Ray. But he never touches my romantic heart. NEVER. That heart is locked and sealed in seven-times-seventy-seals each one inscribed with a different mystery glyph and YOU AND YOU ALONE have the key to EACH one of the locks.

YOU and ONLY YOU.

When my body is taken in the ritual, it is nightside frenzy and it is POWER. Not LOVE. Never.

Of the ten quintillion beings in the cosmos, only you can make me love.

Only you.





[edit on 16-5-2009 by Goatflesh Gnosis]

Ok this got way too deep way too quickly.

Like everything else with us.

Wonderful. terrible. Wonderful.

I'm logging off right now. I'm coming upstairs for you.

First argument-
Silent..Whatever happened to ladies first?
You started the thread when your girl could've used the points being new and all??
Oh for shame dear sir....

Yin meets Yang

If you get right up close to her but it'll look really really massive and if your far far away it looks really tiny, perspective is crazy like that.

But seriously do you two have a Karmic tie or something.

enjoy

---

All that aside, I'd like to know how you reconcile the fact that one of you is involved in satanic practice and the other is stood in the light so to speak, dont you attempt to erode each others beliefs or is the subject avoided.





[edit on 17-5-2009 by DiscoDave]

Good point. But when I started this she had too few posts to make her own thread...under the new laws you have to have a certain minimum number before you can start your own



Tell me about it... I think I'm going to go insane soon. Pretty soon, yep.

We made a verbal agreement not to try to "convert" each other, although we are allowed to (and indeed, do...obsessively) argue for our various viewpoints. Its a fine line, however, and lots of times things get...confusing.

From my own perspective, I'd like to believe that the path of life and light is big and warm enough to enfold the dark path (which is smaller and more limited) and melt it gently through the power of love...the jury is still out on that one, though.

What a load of pompous garden fertilizer. See folks, this is what I have to put up with "From my own perspective I'd like to believe..." Why don't you just say "I believe...", or better yet, just say whatever the heck you are trying to say?

Buddhism = passive-aggressivity refined to a high art and coated with sugary-sweet verbal twaddle.

And all this nonsense about light and life...this from a man who owns a solid gold statue of his precious Amida Buddha that could probably feed a small central African nation for a year. Why don't you put your money where your mouth is, babe?

And to Mr. Disco-Dave,

Thanks for your U2U...unfortunately I don't have enough posts yet to reply to them, which is a rule for some reason. This board seems awfully strict...but no worries, I'm quite thick skinned and welcome any and all comments.

Both of us have been trying to put a moritorium on our respective internet addictions, and get out there in the real world and actually, you know, do stuff. So postings to this and other boards have fallen behind...but keep the good vibes coming.

It's passive agressive twaddle if the person is pretending to be passive opposed to genuinely passive. All passive aggressives inevitably direct their aggression out and no matter how nicely they dress it up it's still bad khama. Actions always betray ones true charactor and bad energy is bad energy even when disguised as something positive.

This is a good point, but I would argue that the concept of pasive-aggressivity is harwied int o the "software" of Buddhism at a very fundamental level.

Remember, Buddhism was the religion of kings, emperors, potentates, Poobahs, and other rather blood-drenched types through most of Asian history. They don't call it "Oriental Despotism" for nothing. Those kindly, weizened Tibetan Monks for centrues rulled massive fiefs of slaves and involved whips, stocks, work-till-you-drop-dead. and other charming techniques to squeeze value and goal from their vassals. Google "the Shadow of the Dalai Lama" for more on this.

Elsewhere... well, "Zen and the Art of Archery" sounds all gentle and new-agey when writen in flowing calligraphy on the cover of a Waldenbooks paperback, until you realize what those famed Zen Archers were shooting at was the human aorta, in order to releace a spray of blood. Its an incredibly violence -soaked tradition. Zen "detachment" was used to turn Japanese soldiers and kamaikazi into atonomtons, killing machines capable of ruthless slaughter;. Google "The Rape of Nanking." Before that, in the barbaric Sengoku Jidai of the Japanese middle ages, Zen monks bore a greeat deal of complicity in their roles teaching soldiers to detach from reality and crush their morality until they were able to slaughter as if "one were contemplating a flower petal gliding to the surface of a summer pond."

Part of my esteemed and beloved Boyfriend's passive aggressivity comes from this tradition of denial and crush-all-reasoning that he learned squatting in that medieval Japanese monestary of his for four yerars. Part comes from living most of his life in East Asia, where verbal and social codes demand subtle word-dances rather than blurting the obvious.

But as an impatient, Gen Y traverser of demonic paths, I demand direct info and I demand it now! Allowances must be made in both directions. He's admitted this before, but watch him squirm when pinned down.

Oh and by the way, log the heck off of your computer, wherever you are, get on a train/plane/bus/auto/donkeyback and COME HOME! Its been three days and I miss you to distraction, dear softie of a passive-aggressive midlife man of my dreams.

I don't know what kind of shenanigans I'm likely to get up to if you don't come back soon...rather perverse thoughts are floating though my feavered brain and I need you here NOW to realize them in the flesh as it were.

I also don't like the fact of you mucking about so close to the North Korean boarder. If those nuts are going to start shootimg off their rustbuckets I at the very least want you here in my arms whem we drift off to the great beyond.

Missing thee,

Your eternal Ganachacric Gee Gee

Hmm, passive-aggressive and hyper-aggressive. I have to admit, this thread is more interesting than I thought it'd be when I clicked on it. Since I don't believe in any of your religions (or any religion for that matter,) what I see is a very interesting psychological situation. I'm excited to see this play out a little more.

you two appear to be perfect for each other.
If you love each other then why is it so important to be so right and to prove the other so wrong?

Let her live and love you, as you live and love her.

I reckon eat your vegetarian, while she eats her meat and laugh into the chai tea whilst she enjoys her vodka and have a nice time. Good luck to you both.






[edit on 5-6-2009 by flashesofblue]

LOL, this is pretty funny...

Too bad you don't apply this level of critique to everything supernatural.

Yeah, I think you're right, but I would be inclined to replace "Passive-aggressivity" with "Self-righteousness."