Good ol' Chris Rock.
Also:
Superman's in a wheelchair? What next? Aquaman's gonna drown in the bath?
And:
People should be allowed to own guns. But the bullets should be made expensive. Then people would be like, "I'm gonna kill you. I'm gonna get me a
second job and you'd better pray I can't buy no bullets on lay-away"
(or something similar)
And also:
America needs a new black leader. We need a new Martin Luther King. Jesse Jackson was pretty good, he got those pilots back, but Louis Farrakhan hates
the Jews. I don't have time to hate the Jews, I hate all white people.